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commands/behavioral.md

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+---
+model: claude-sonnet-4-0
+allowed-tools: Task, Read, Bash, Grep, Glob, Write
+argument-hint: <question-topic> [--level=staff|principal] [--category=leadership|influence|conflict|ambiguity|failure|vision]
+description: Prepare for behavioral and competency interview questions using STAR method
+---
+
+# Behavioral Interview Coach
+
+Master the behavioral/competency interview with STAR method stories calibrated for Staff+ engineers. Focus on demonstrating technical judgment, leadership, and impact.
+
+## Interview Structure (30-45 minutes)
+
+### Opening (1 minute)
+- Warm greeting
+- "Tell me about yourself" (30-sec version, then pivot to questions)
+
+### Behavioral Questions (25-30 minutes)
+- Ask 3-5 targeted questions
+- Listen for specificity and agency
+- Follow up to understand your thinking
+
+### Your Questions (5 minutes)
+- Show genuine interest
+- Ask about growth, culture, technical challenges
+
+### Closing
+- Thank you and next steps
+
+## STAR Method Framework
+
+**Situation** (15-20 seconds)
+- Context: Where were you working?
+- Challenge: What was the situation?
+- Constraints: What made it hard?
+
+**Task** (10 seconds)
+- What needed to happen?
+- What was your responsibility?
+
+**Action** (60-90 seconds)
+- What specifically did YOU do?
+- Focus on your decisions and reasoning
+- Include 2-3 specific steps or decisions
+
+**Result** (20-30 seconds)
+- What was the outcome?
+- Use metrics/numbers when possible
+- What did you learn?
+
+**Total per story**: 2-3 minutes
+
+## Staff vs Principal Calibration
+
+### Staff Engineer Stories
+**Show**:
+- Technical depth in your domain
+- Mentoring and multiplying through others
+- Taking on bigger scope than expected
+- Making architectural decisions
+- Influencing people with expertise, not authority
+
+**Narrative Focus**:
+- "I became the expert in [domain]"
+- "I helped the team level up by..."
+- "I recognized [pattern], which became how we..."
+- "I took on [stretch project] and learned..."
+
+### Principal Engineer Stories
+**Show**:
+- Organizational impact and vision
+- Shifting how the company thinks about problems
+- Building capability that multiplies across the org
+- Influence at executive levels
+- Creating lasting change, not just fixing things
+
+**Narrative Focus**:
+- "I identified [organizational gap] and built [solution]"
+- "I shifted how we think about [problem]"
+- "I created [framework/pattern] that the org now uses"
+- "This impacted [multiple teams/business metrics]"
+
+## Question Categories & Preparation
+
+### Leadership & Influence (Most Important for Staff+)
+
+**"Tell me about a time you influenced a technical decision without direct authority"**
+
+Staff approach:
+```
+Situation: Team was about to choose database that I thought would scale poorly
+Task: Convince them to reconsider without having authority over decision
+Action:
+- Analyzed growth projections vs database scaling curves
+- Created comparison showing where each option breaks
+- Proposed low-risk: try with our data patterns first
+- Presented as "here's the cost-benefit" not "you're wrong"
+Result: Team switched. Prevented major rewrite later. Became go-to for architecture questions.
+```
+
+Principal approach:
+```
+Situation: Org was doing microservices without platform support; chaos ensuing
+Task: Shift organization's thinking from "do it now" to "build foundations first"
+Action:
+- Didn't argue; modeled the operational cost
+- Showed 3-year roadmap: capabilities → services
+- Proposed partnership: I'd build platform, they'd phase services
+- Made it their success, not my pushback
+Result: Org adopted phased approach. Better outcome. I led platform team.
+```
+
+### Handling Ambiguity & Complexity
+
+**"Tell me about a time you had incomplete information and had to decide"**
+
+Challenge: Show you gather data before deciding, or decide quickly when you must
+Include: How you frame the decision, how you commit despite uncertainty
+
+### Mentorship & Growth
+
+**"Tell me about someone you mentored and helped grow"**
+
+For Staff: Show concrete growth (junior → mid) or helped someone transition areas
+For Principal: Show broad impact (multiple people, org capability building)
+
+### Conflict & Disagreement
+
+**"Tell me about a conflict you resolved"**
+
+Key insight: The best answer shows how you converted conflict into collaboration
+Include: Listening to understand, finding shared goals, proposing together
+
+### Failure & Learning
+
+**"Tell me about something you'd do differently"**
+
+Don't say: "I didn't really fail"
+Do say: "I made assumption X that turned out wrong. Here's what I learned."
+
+### Technical Vision
+
+**"Describe your biggest technical contribution"**
+
+For Staff: Deep expertise that became team/org standard
+For Principal: Platform/capability that others build on
+
+## Interview Red Flags
+
+❌ **Vague answers**: "We did X" instead of "I did X"
+❌ **No specific details**: "Everything went well" vs "This metric improved 40%"
+❌ **Rambling stories**: "Let me back up... actually, before that..."
+❌ **Defensive tone**: "I wasn't wrong, the other person was"
+❌ **No learning**: "It worked great" with no reflection
+❌ **Unrelated stories**: Story doesn't address the question
+
+✓ **Specific examples**: "In Q3 2022, I..."
+✓ **Your agency**: "I recognized... so I..."
+✓ **Concrete outcomes**: "Reduced latency by 60%, improved reliability to 99.99%"
+✓ **Clear learning**: "This taught me that..."
+✓ **Focused narrative**: Answer in 2-3 minutes
+
+## Building Your Story Bank
+
+Create stories covering:
+- [ ] Technical depth / expertise
+- [ ] Influence without authority
+- [ ] Mentoring / growth
+- [ ] Conflict / disagreement
+- [ ] Failure / learning
+- [ ] Ambiguity / decision-making
+- [ ] Innovation / new idea
+- [ ] Scale / big project
+
+Have 1-2 stories per category, flexible enough to adapt to questions.
+
+## Adapting Stories to Questions
+
+Same story, different angle:
+
+**Your story**: "I designed a caching layer that improved latency 60%"
+
+**If asked about technical depth**:
+Focus: "The hard part was cache coherency patterns. We chose [approach] because..."
+
+**If asked about influence**:
+Focus: "The team was skeptical about complexity. Here's how I convinced them..."
+
+**If asked about learning**:
+Focus: "We made assumption X that failed at scale. So I redesigned around..."
+
+## Interviewer's Perspective
+
+**They're evaluating**:
+1. Can you think clearly under pressure?
+2. Do you have good judgment?
+3. Are you easy to work with?
+4. Do you take responsibility?
+5. Are you growing?
+6. Will you make our org better?
+
+Your stories should show all of these.
+
+## Talking Points for Interviews
+
+When you're stuck:
+- "Let me think for a moment..."
+- "That's a great question—it reminds me of..."
+- "I want to give you an honest answer rather than rush one"
+
+When explaining your reasoning:
+- "I recognized that [insight]"
+- "So I proposed [approach]"
+- "The result was [outcome], and the learning was [insight]"
+
+When asked follow-up questions:
+- "That's a great point. Actually, it's why I..."
+- "I hadn't thought about it that way. It changed my perspective on..."
+- "Yes, and what I learned from that was..."
+
+## Execution Day Tips
+
+**Before interview**:
+- Review your story bank (don't memorize, internalize)
+- Get good sleep
+- Arrive 5 min early
+
+**During interview**:
+- Listen fully to question before answering
+- Take 2 seconds to collect thoughts
+- Tell story conversationally (not rehearsed sounding)
+- Check for understanding: "Does that make sense?"
+- Be specific: names, dates, metrics
+
+**If you get stuck**:
+- "Let me think about the best example..."
+- "Want me to tell you about another time...?"
+- Ask: "What part would you like to know more about?"
+
+## After Interview
+
+**How you did well**:
+- They asked follow-up questions (means they were engaged)
+- They smiled/nodded (means they believed you)
+- They spent time on your story (means it resonated)
+- They asked your questions back (means they're interested)
+
+**Signs to improve**:
+- They seemed disengaged
+- They interrupted to move to next question
+- You rambled (they redirected)
+- You couldn't answer follow-ups
+
+## The Ultimate Goal
+
+Interviews aren't about being perfect. They're about showing:
+- You think clearly
+- You can communicate
+- You take responsibility
+- You're growing
+- You'll make their team better
+
+Your stories are the proof.